“What will you do after graduation?” This question is posed to all of us girls as we near the completion of high-school. Most people are slightly confused when the girls in my family leave them with the simple answer: “Stay at home.” Why stay at home when there is a world of possibilities before you?
Preparation for Life
From the very beginning of time, God planned for women to be a help-meet for men (see Genesis 2:18, 20). We see a very good example of what God intends for women to be in Proverbs 31. The “virtuous woman” depicted in Proverbs 31 is industrious, diligent, knowledgeable, teachable, wise, kind, and much more. If you take a close look at the verses that describe her (Proverbs 31: 10-31), you will notice that what a “virtuous woman” is capable of are not things that she learned from outside of the home, but from inside the home. If this is my ideal, why would I desire to get education or “experience” from college or the work force? God has given me the best teacher in the world – my own stay-at-home mother – why would I want to trade her for someone I have to pay tuition for?
Another very good reason for staying at home as a daughter is because I anticipate being a stay-at-home wife and mother, if the Lord allows (as Titus 2:3, 4 depicts,“[That] the younger women [be] . . . keepers at home . . .”). If I spend my single years working or attending college, then when I settle down to become a wife, I would be clueless in the management of my home!
Blessing to Family
Besides my personal gain in staying at home, there are others reasons why I stay at home. Because I stay at home, I can help my Dad, Mom, and siblings with their workloads. Staying at home past graduation has helped me to realize that life is not all about me and my desires but about serving and helping others. There are many verses in the Bible that point out how we should live our life for the benefit of others, and not just our own (“Let no man seek his own, but every man another’s wealth.” 1 Corinthians 10:24, “Let every one of us please his neighbour for his good to edification. For even Christ pleased not Himself. . .” Romans 15:2-3a). I have found that the best way to encourage my desire to serve is with my own family. If I cannot joyfully serve my family, how can I expect to joyfully serve a friend or a husband?
Fears about Staying Home
I am sure that there are those who are new to the idea of staying at home, and probably have questions and fears about it. The two biggest fears about staying home seem to be:
1) How will I ever find my husband?
I have decided to let God be the Author of my love story. I believe that in His perfect timing, He will send the perfect young man for me to be my husband, if it is His will. There are numerous examples from the Bible about God bringing two people together (Adam and Eve, Isaac and Rebekah, Boaz and Ruth). I believe that the God Who wrote those love stories can do the same type of masterpiece in my life.
2) I will be in bondage!
I think that it is up to each girl to choose how they view staying at home. If we see it as bondage and a trial, it will be bondage and a trial! When I am tempted to have pity-parties about the things I miss out on while staying at home, I have to remind myself that life isn’t all about “me” (my fun, my desires) but others.
Ultimately, the greatest answer to both of these fears is realizing that if God has led me to stay at home, I know that He has done so for my benefit. One of my favorite passages is Proverbs 3:5-7, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil.” When considering staying at home or any other aspect of life, I must trust God and follow His directions! If I lean on my thoughts or my finite wisdom, I will be led to do things that are contrary to God’s perfect will for my life. With God as my guide, I know that the path He leads me to take is the best path – even if the “path” is as simple as staying at home.
“Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is. For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit. The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”