Ephesians 4:1,
And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to
wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Provoke
to wrath - NT:3949 parorgizo
(par-org-id'-zo); from NT:3844 and NT:3710; to anger alongside, i.e. enrage:
Nurture
- NT:3809 paideia (pahee-di'-ah); from
NT:3811; tutorage, i.e. education or training; by implication, disciplinary
correction:
Admonition
- NT:3559 nouthesia (noo-thes-ee'-ah); from NT:3563 and a derivative of
NT:5087; calling attention to, i.e. (by implication) mild rebuke or warning:
It
is possible for fathers to be guilty of provoking their children to wrath -
otherwise, they would not be warned against it. Colossians 3:21 reiterates
this, "Fathers, provoke not your
children to anger, lest they be discouraged." Here, lies the
responsibility of the father, not of the children. Children have already been
commanded to obey and honor, but fathers should never use that as a reason to do
whatever they desire. Even by demanding obedience and honor, fathers can
provoke their children to wrath.
Instead
of provocation, fathers are given the command to raise their children with
nurture (education, training, disciplinary correction) and admonition (calling
attention, mild rebuke or warning). These words help us to understand the
attitude behind training. Instead of forceful, angry training, fathers are to
have a humble attitude. They can discipline their children and rebuke them, but
it is done in a gentle spirit. The issue at hand is not the means of raising children, but the attitude of raising children.
What
better example of fatherhood is there than God the Father? Hebrews 12 gives us
a glimpse of God the Father: "(5)
And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children,
My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art
rebuked of him: (6) For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every
son whom he receiveth. (7) If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as
with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? (8) But if ye be
without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not
sons. (9) Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and
we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the
Father of spirits, and live? (10) For they verily for a few days chastened us
after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of
his holiness. (11) Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but
grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of
righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." (Hebrews
12:5-11)
God
does not father without chastening - but His chastening is always rooted in His
love for us and His interest in our profit. God never chastens because it just
"feels good" to chasten. He always has a reason for His chastisement.
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